PARTY OF FIVE: BRIDGING THE GAP

When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge — or embrace forgiveness and move forward. By embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. Dr. Katherine Piderman, Mayo Clinic

FORGIVENESS. Such a difficult word. Actually, the more I think about it, I realize it's a WONDERFUL, LIFE CHANGING word but it's often times a VERY DIFFICULT action. I should know. As most of you know, I was estranged from my brother and his family for a year....until recently when it all changed. We found forgiveness in ourselves and with one another. It left me wondering why we didn't do so before. It's so easy to hold on to a grudge and not be willing to move forward...to forgive. It's so easy to focus on what the other party would think if you tried to take the first step to forgiveness and reconciliation. It's not an easy path, the path to forgiveness. That is a fact. However, it's what GOD teaches us to do. ^"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you." Matthew 6:14
After all, GOD led by example. He showed the ULTIMATE forgiveness by giving up his ONLY son to suffer and to die on the cross in an act to show forgiveness of OUR sins. The VERY least we can do is to forgive one another. We are all human. We all make mistakes. It's a part of life. No one is perfect. Even when you think you have the other person's best interest at heart, things can come across wrong and someone could be hurt or angered. It's easy to do whether intentional or not.
I've had MANY people tell me over this last year that I should stay away from my brother. I shouldn't forgive him. He hadn't talked to me in a year so he didn't care. Luckily for me I am a strong person and I make MY OWN decisions but most importantly, I had a wonderful upbringing that included my faith. I knew in my heart that I should forgive my brother and ask my brother to forgive me as well. Neither of us were perfect and we had both made mistakes that warranted forgiveness. What I could not understand was why someone, anyone, would suggest I don't forgive. That I should just continue living life as if I had never had a brother in the first place. My brother was my VERY best friend. He's always meant more to me than anyone else on the planet. We always went to each other for advice. We comforted one another in times of grief. We celebrated one another's accomplishments. We were and always had been there for one another...no matter what.
Last year we had a falling out due to many things and faults on both sides. We didn't try to work things out correctly and too many people got involved and MANY hurtful things were said on both sides. It left us both feeling angry, resentful and anything but ready to forgive. We were both left devastated but neither of us would admit it. I lost a year with my brother and my niece and nephews. He lost a year with me, Joe and the boys. I will admit that for awhile we weren't at the right place to seek forgiveness. I just regret it took us so long and that the whole situation occurred in the first place.
I am so thankful that we finally have been able to put the past behind us and move on. To be able to sit down and work things out and talk things through. I miss my brother so badly. More than I could put into words. Seeing my niece and nephews after a year was a shock. They grew so much!
I am blessed to have those I love most back in my life. We all learned a lot from this and we all have grown up much more. We realized life is too short for something like this to ever happen again. My brother and I were always so close that once we talked things through, everything fell right back into the way it was before. At times it nearly feels like none of the bad even occurred. I am grateful for that and it also proves to those doubters that the relationship I had with my baby brother was definitely worth saving! You only get one family. Aaron was/is my only sibling. I'd be lost without him. I am an Aunt to 3 WONDERFUL kiddos and my life would not be complete without them in it.

Last night while I was cooking dinner for 8, I looked out my kitchen window and had to smile at what I saw. My boys were playing with their cousins and having a blast. My husband and my brother were clearing tree branches so they could play basketball on our back patio. Life was back to normal. My life was once again complete. The happiness in my heart at the picture outside my window was nothing short of wonderful!

Then after the storm while the older kids were helping Joe and Aaron clear debris, I had time to bond with my youngest nephew Elijah. He makes me smile and already LOVES his Aunt Sissy. The last time I saw him he was 3 weeks old...now he is 13 months!

Once all the kids were good and dirty and my house had no power AND it was getting VERY dark in my house....we gave the 5 older kids a bath....at the same time....by candlelight.....in 95% darkness....Good Times!!!